In My Own Eyes, Part 2

I’m taking a break again from Luke for part 2 of In My Own Eyes. Click here to read In My Own Eyes, part 1.  

Proverbs 3:5-7 

There is no manner of life in the world more sweet or more delicious than continual conversation with God. They alone can understand it who practice it and savor it. I do not advise you, however, to practice it for this motive. The desire for spiritual consolation must not be our purpose in carrying on this practice. Instead, let us do it out of love for God and because it is His will. 

Oh! If we only knew how much we need the grace and help of God, we would never lose sight of Him, not even for a moment. Brother Lawrence, Practicing the Presence of God. 

I’m Mad 

I have been going to bed mad lately. Mad at myself.

I have a renewed commitment lately to practice the presence of God. As I lay my head down on the pillow each evening, I turn my attention to my aspirations of dwelling within God (rather than living in my own mind). As I think back on my day, I’m immediately struck with how little I have consciously realized His presence throughout the day.

You shall not act like this (follow after idols and images) toward the Lord your God. But you shall seek the Lord at the place which the Lord your God will choose from your tribes, to establish His name there for His dwelling, and there you shall come. Deuteronomy 12.4,5

Yes, my renewed commitment is bearing some fruit and I am more aware of God’s presence daily. But at this point in my life, being a Christian for so many years, I feel I should be closer and more intimate with Him.

Some might say I’m too hard on myself. Well, I suppose it’s all relative. But in my heart, I know that:

  • I’m not loving God as I should in the simple and practical way of talking to Him and listening; praising Him and thanking Him; adoring Him and expressing love.
  • I’m not seeking His wisdom and guidance; I’m not asking for His advice and help; I’m not applying His teachings and precepts from His Word continually…as I should.
  • I’m doing the best I can as a husband, as a father, as a friend: I’m doing my best as an employee, as a writer, as a boss; I’m doing mybest…I’m exerting a lot of energy doing MY best. Instead, my purpose should be to release myself to HIS best for me and through me and in me.

To do our best in life is the natural way in which we go about daily life. But doing our best is living within ourselves and living as it seems best to us at the moment. A better way is to whisper to God throughout the day and seek His guidance, His Wisdom and His power. This is quite different than doing ‘my best.’

Here’s a simple prescription for walking with God:

  1. Input God’s Word into your mind in the morning
  2. Think often of God throughout the day.
  3. Reflect and review your day in the evening (but don’t beat yourself up as badly as I do :).
  4. Start slow and build up.

It’s about You, not me!

Ok, I’m done beating myself up. I’ve confessed my shortcomings and spiritual weaknesses. Perhaps I have convicted you of your shortcomings in this area as well. Now, join me in thanksgiving and supplication:

Lord, You saved my soul but You have left me with this selfish and sinful flesh nature. I’m not saying it’s Your fault that I’m not as spiritual as I should be, but I am saying, ‘I need Your help. I can’t do it myself.’ Do a work within me that I can never do myself of my own efforts. May you kindly grant Your grace that I might increase in my love for You; my thoughts of You and my affections toward You. 

  • To seek the Lord in worship and submission.  
  • To seek His favor and guidance.  
  • To trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and He will make your paths straight.  
  • To not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and turn away from evil. Proverbs 3.5-7 

Thank You, Father, for Your kind and gentle care for me. Whether I am conscious of You or not, You never forget me, never leave me, I am always on Your mind. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You! Amen.